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Sometimes, a 22-year-old from Los Angeles feels he is “the greatest person on planet Earth”. As a diagnosed narcissist, his grandiose moments can become “detached from reality”, he explains. You’re riding high and you’re like, ‘Everyone’s going to know that I surpass everyone else … I’m destined for greatness for the world’.”

In his case, these times of heightened ego are often succeeded by a “sudden low”, a period when he feels overwhelmed and self-conscious about his actions, rendering him particularly vulnerable to disapproval from others. He came to wonder he might have NPD after investigating his behaviors through digital sources – and was later confirmed by a specialist. However, he is skeptical he would have accepted the diagnosis if he hadn’t independently formed that understanding on his own. Should you attempt to inform somebody that they have the condition, {they’ll probably deny it|denial is a common response|they’re likely to reject it,” he comments – most notably if they feel feelings of superiority. They inhabit a fantasy reality that they’ve built up. And that world is like, I am superior and {nobody can question me|no one should doubt me|my authority is absolute.”

Understanding NPD

Though people have been identified with narcissism for decades, the meaning can be ambiguous what is meant by the diagnosis. People frequently term everybody a narcissist,” explains an expert in narcissism, who believes the word is “overused” – but when it comes to a formal diagnosis, he believes many people hide it, due to significant negative perception associated with the disorder. Someone with NPD will tend to have “a heightened sense of self”, “impaired compassion”, and “a tendency to exploit relationships to seek admiration through actions such as pursuing power,” the specialist clarifies. Those with NPD may be “deeply egotistical”, to the point that {“they’re not able to hold down stable relationships|“their jobs are damaged|“they have a distorted view of reality,” he states.

Emotional connections were never important about anyone really, so I didn’t invest in relationships seriously

Sex-Based Distinctions in Narcissism

While three-quarters of people diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder are men, studies indicates this figure does not mean there are a lower rate among women, but that narcissism in women is more often presented in the vulnerable narcissism type, which is under-identified. “Men’s narcissism tends to be a bit more accepted, just kind of like everything in society,” says a young adult who shares content on her dual diagnosis on online channels. Frequently, the two disorders co-occur.

Individual Challenges

It’s hard for me with receiving negative comments and being turned down,” she explains, “because if I hear that the issue lies with me, I tend to switch to a defensive state or I completely shut down.” Despite having this behavior – which is often called “ego wounding”, she has been working to manage it and accept input from her loved ones, as she strives not to return into the negative conduct of her previous life. “I was very emotionally abusive to my partners in my youth,” she states. Through dialectical behavioural therapy, she has been able to reduce her narcissistic traits, and she explains she and her significant other “operate with an understanding where we’ve agreed, ‘Should I make a harmful comment, when I use toxic language, call it out {right then and there|immediately|in the moment’.”

Her childhood mostly in the care of her father and notes she didn’t have positive role models as a child. “I’ve been learning over the years what is suitable or harmful to say when arguing because I never had that growing up,” she shares. Every insult was fair game when my family members were belittling me in my early years.”

Root Causes of Narcissistic Traits

Conditions like NPD tend to be linked to early life adversity. “There is a genetic component,” explains a mental health specialist. But, when someone shows signs of narcissism, it is often “connected with that person’s unique upbringing”. Those traits were “a coping mechanism in some ways to survive at a very early age”, he states, when they may have been overlooked, or only shown love that was conditional on meeting specific standards. They then “continue to use those familiar tactics as adults”.

In common with many of the individuals with NPD, one individual thinks his parents “might exhibit similar traits. The individual shares when he was a child, “their needs came first and their work and their social life. So it was like, keep your distance.” When their focus was on him, it came in the form of “significant demands to achieve academic success and professional advancement, he notes, which made him feel that if he didn’t fulfill their expectations, he wasn’t “worthy.

When he became an adult, none of his relationships ever worked out. I didn’t truly value about anyone really,” he says. Therefore, I never treated relationships seriously.” He felt incapable of loving someone, until he met his current partner of three years, who is facing similar challenges, so, like him, has difficulty with emotional regulation. She is “very supportive of the internal struggles in my head”, he explains – it was in fact, her who first suspected he might have NPD.

Seeking Help

After a visit to his GP, he was directed to a mental health professional for an evaluation and was given the NPD label. He has been referred for psychological counseling via government-funded care (extended treatment is the primary approach that has been shown to help NPD patients, experts say), but has been on the waiting list for an extended period: The estimate was it is expected around maybe February or March next year.”

Disclosure was limited to a handful of people about his condition, because “there’s a big stigma that every person with NPD is harmful”, but, in his own mind, he has accepted it. The awareness assists me to comprehend my actions, which is positive,” he explains. Those interviewed have acknowledged their condition and are looking for support for it – leading them to be open to talk about it – which is possibly not the norm of all people with the condition. But the growth of online advocates and the expansion of virtual networks indicate that {more narcissists|a growing number